Saturday, September 20, 2008

Looking for the Stinky Legally Blonde Library...

A.K.A. Beverly Hills Library where the funk runs a muck! I came here because I drove all the way to work...again without my keys. God I'm stupid. So I get to work and the paparazzi are standing in front of my gate. So I say what the hell do you guys want? Jessica Alba is what they were waiting for. She was on the 4th floor, I work on the 5th. Whatever I don't have my keys anyway. So I do a lil paparazzi interview, I won't go into it but I found out that they literally sit in front of poor Jessica Alba's house waiting for her to follow her every single weekend. Assholes. Look out for Ms. Hart on TMZ I gave em' a few money shots ;)

Ok, back to business...
WTF is that smell. OMG I'm going to puke. Thank the good lord I'm surrounded by L.A.s finest wanna be dr.s and dr.ettes. Wow, the entire library is filled with medical students. Is it stinky med school student study brain day? They are all looking at diagrams of the brain. It's sorta like the twilight zone. The smell, the attire and most importantly the schizophrenic man to my right who gets up every 5 minutes to spit in the trash can conveniently located to my left. I guess he is blind cuz I'm shooting those "It is not ok to spit in front of ladies, indoors, at the library" glares.

Oh word to the wise....hide ur Black's dictionary unless you want to be accosted by every single practicing, unemployed or aspiring attorney in the world. Its like a conversation starter....EXCEPT I'm trying to fucking study! Here is my favorite for today:

O.J. look alike: "Um hi I see you have Black's are you studying for the Feb. Bar? I am an attorney you know."

Me: (to my self) holy shit will I still need a dictionary when I'm studying for the Bar?

Me: "No, I'm a first year"

O.J.: OH, what school?"

Me: ".....sucky law school in Cali"

O.J. gives me a puzzled look and says, "OH thats one of those unaccredited online schools huh?"

Me: "Fuck no man-- do I look stupid to you?"

Me: "Go away O.J. don't u have some work to do?"

Now I'm at the cool kid table. Just me gramps and the happy lil med students. They are adorable and they look worse than us! I guess playing god takes more training than playing Satan.

By the way Abigail isn't out of the woods yet. Her potassium levels are super high. They are keeping her for another day to go over the lab work and check out her kidneys. My poor sister.

1 comment:

Nichi said...

don't tell tm about how close you were to the woman of his dreams!