Purgatory

What an awkward feeling..there is light at the end of the tunnel but it's a train! That was the best articulation of how I feel today. It's the calm before the storm, the in between time, that eery quiet moment before you officially lose your mind. There is time to breathe but the uneasy feeling hasn't quite subsided. Am I forgetting something, is something due, are you sure we don't have to read anymore, is there really only one class left? Holy freakin shit!!

My "toolbox" consists of several different binders stuffed full of notes, handouts, and practice exams all out of order and mixed up. Where do I begin? Organization is one of my stronger points but this appears to be hopeless. I'm really confused right now. In between my ears you will find nothing but cobwebs. This weekend I must get a handle on this. The problem is when faced with chaos I resort to the trash can and when that happens....I usually end up tossing very important papers in my hasty attempt to clear the cobwebs. A few deep breaths, no coffee, and a clear mind will be in order. I will sort, organize, file, and toss as necessary. Monday I will have a coherent plan of action which does not include studying in the law library.

The best way to avoid a panic attack is to stay away from the freak outs. You can find the freakouts aka 1Ls at the law library at any time of the day or night. They spend most of their time chain smoking and loitering in front of the building. Or discussing Taco Tuesday or who is screwing who. It can be distracting, disappointing, and nerve racking, I will steer clear. That's the plan.

On a happier note-we have spring starts which means I will no longer be one of the new kids on campus. A whole new cohort starts in January. Suckers. Now I can walk around giving them dirty looks and laughing at their misery the way everyone did to my cohort. Nah, I wouldn't do that.

Oh I passed legal research. haha! Really I did.

p.s. you know people are getting weird when they notice you have a fresh pedicure...I don't wear sandles that often, I prefer shoes. Anyway today I decided to go get pampered before class with a spa pedi and mani. I wore sandles since it is 85 degrees in California. Anyway this girl says to me, "Ohhh I wish I had time to get a pedicure." WTF are you serious? First of all...why did you notice that? Secondly, you work 15 hours a week and go to school part time!! I work 30 hours a week live an hour away from school and it only took one hour for the pedicure anyway! I was annoyed.