I don't want to be the class Ambassador anymore. It's too much pressure. I have had five phone calls and texts all day long from classmates with questions. I swear to god I do not know more than they do and they all EXPECT me to do so well. It is making me crazy and it is monopolizing my time.
Tomorrow I am sending an email saying that i dropped my phone in the toilet and Im turning that SOB OFF! I truly do enjoy helping people but now we are too close to game time and I don't want to give anyone an edge on me because of my own freakin work. You know what I mean? I could be supplying my competitors with the amo they need to outdo me. Im so tired.
Just imagine the dissapointment I will have when grades are distributed and I do poorly. Not only will I be letting myself down but I will feel like a failure based on the confidence my classmates have in me. Maybe I can try to use this pressure to drive me to keep working harder even though I am feeling like there is no more I can do.
This post might sound self rightious or even like i am bragging but I am not it's just that I was all too accomodating to all the slackers and now they depend on me. I set myself up for this one.
It really boils down to just that...I am not a slacker. Not that I am smarter but I have dedicated a lot of time to preparation and they have not. Fuck I don't know.
p.s my cat just puked in my bed on my clean sheets. Awesome
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1 comment:
I totally understand where you're coming from. It's not being mean, you worked hard to figure those concepts out and it's not fair for someone to come riding in at the last minute and expect you to give up the answers after hours of preparation and frustration.
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