Friday, January 16, 2009

Socially awkward

Now that's a phrase all law students are familiar with ...if it isn't our classmates, ourselves, or our professors its someone else but we are all surrounded by these strange fuckers who just don't know how to be human.

Today smarty pants got schooled. I couldn't take one more freakin minute of her bragging. Somehow I managed to find the right time, although anytime is the right time for me to speak my mind, to tell her that her bragging is ANNOYING THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE. The conversation began with some preliminary investigations into her psyche. I have no idea if that is even English but anyway I asked her if she had ever had a job--a real job. She said no. Ok no biggy, I am in the NJZ (no judgment zone) so i proceed...ok I tell her well you see in the corporate world, in which I have worked for about 10 years there is this lil rule. You are prohibited from telling your co-workers how much you make $$ and some employers will fire you. Then I asked her if she knew why. Smarty pants was baffled, she blinked and cocked her head sideways and said, "If you can't handle other people's success in law school then you should rethink your career choice, maybe you are not cut out for this." Miss smarty pants has supposedly gained 40lbs in 6 months so I told her...how would you like it if I bragged about how skinny, pretty and rich I am all the time? (I am none of these by the way) She said she wouldnt care. freak.

Thats when I lied..........I told her you know what miss smarty pants I did EXCELLENT on the same exam and i did not finish it---so your so-called good grade doesn't phase me but I'll tell you what it def. puts a bad taste in other peoples mouths. You need to be HUMBLE and understand that gloating is RUDE so please stop before you get linched. Unlike you missy I know what it is like in the real world and you are not making any friends. This is when she let me know she was not here to make friends. Major mistake number 2--listen here miss smarty pants you will get no where in life without networking...us, you know the people here with you, may come in handy one day and the better relationships you build the more back scratching you will see in your future. Networking honey...you need to learn how to play this game or else you cutesy lil degree from this bullshit school will do nothing for you! REALITY CHECK!

Guess what...she got it and admitted to not realizing this was impolite. Im done with her and her grades- fuck give it a rest. Now issue number 2: My fake friend quit law school. The one I was so jealous of is gone. One less smarty pants to compete with.

Issue #3: We had crim law with the FRESH MEAT I was dying to see them. Well they suck ass. Obnoxious and at least 3 gunners. WTF! I have my one gunner under control and now good ol' law school throws like ten more at me. Ewwwwwwwwwww.

Tonight went a lil something like this: Gunner boy "what if...what if....what if...Robin Hood, ...what if...."

My friend turned around and said out loud, "WHAT IF FREAKIN ALIENS CAME DOWN AND PUT THE BEER IN HIS LAP!!!!"

I died. Crim law prof is hot! Woohoo. He went around the class asking each persons name, what year they were, and why they were in law school. Everyone stood up except me of course. I told him my name and said, "I am in law school because I want to practice law." Everyone started laughing. Good. I spared them the whole ridiculous happy bullshit story about how I want to save the poor, or the environment. All in all it was great fun.

Then came good ol' drunk legal writing prof. God I missed him. He is so damn funny. Then things got funny with a classmate and a few text messages later Im thinking I should uh not shit where I eat. Never a dull moment.

p.s. I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE CRIM LAW! I was captivated by the reading. Particularly this article regarding jury nullification. Not a fan. It would be awesome if I found my niche' this early in the game. Then again I love learning anything so this could be a false alarm.

3 comments:

teasinglydiverse said...

oh, this cracked me up! what a week back, huh?? :) i'm sorry the universe sent you gunners!

I really like crim law too. my prof is hilarious. she laughs all the time and i think yesterday someone stopped breathing they were laughing so hard. makes it very fun.

if you're interested in jury nullification, you should read We, The Jury by Jeffrey Abramson. I did a big research paper on jury nullification for my intro to law class in college (MANY moons ago) and I think I got the idea from this book. We had to read it, I know that. I'd probably appreciate it more now than then, but it wasn't a bad read! :)

Cee said...

you are my hero for calling smarty pants out- i never would do that but i wish i could! p.s. i love your pic- the beer/dance pose is awesome!

JD Maybe said...

Def. going to chk out the book. There is something so wrong with jury nullification and at the same time I understand the need for it...

I have a big problem holding my tongue when people irritate me. I like to think that I am patient and tolerant but some people have to be put in there place. My class is down to 18 people so we are all pretty tight and it's easy to be blunt and honest. Plus who hasn't done something rude completely unknowingly. I know I have and I would hope someone would point it out to me.

Thanks about the pic. I love it too. It was staged by the way ;)