Friday, August 10, 2012

You Can't Work Here


*This post is rambling only, it makes no sense and has no real unifying theme. As if my other posts do? Just warning ya! If you are looking for brilliance, it ain't here!

You can't work here because you are too pretty... "We all look for pretty girls when we are hiring but you don't actually SAY that." Disney's boss

Then you have the Master of Rhetoric that posts an employment ad that would make a whore blush.

What is my point you ask? Well, now that I am virtually "dating" like 100 guys, I have decided I am irresistible. Hey, what's wrong with that? Being irresistible means that I'm obviously NEVER going to get a job at a firm where "the" wife works.

Act as self righteous as you want but the truth is: generally speaking, women are NOT ok with a gorgeous girl (me) working in close quarters with their man. I don't even want to hear any BS about being "secure" etc. etc. You put candy in front of a kid, he will eat it..promise! I speak the truth that everyone should accept. Quit fooling yourself with your "I trust my man" bullshit. The best of men will cheat. Monogamy is NOT natural.

Ok, now for reality. I am not gorgeous or irresistible but I had this thought that I should wear a fake wedding ring to the job interview I went on today. Why? Because after some diligent cyber stalking I came to believe that the Attorney's wife worked at his firm. The thought process, aka, stupid inner self chat went like this: I am an excellent interviewee, I am charismatic, quick witted, qualified, and comfortable with people in general so I give off "good vibes." Each time I walk out of an interview I am positive I nailed it. The last two interviews resulted in two very sympathetic emails from the interviewing Attorney's. "You are great, you are perfect, you are amazing, I really liked you BUT....you don't speak Spanish, you will be taking time off for the bar...."

MAYBE THEY DON'T LIKE ME BECAUSE I AM SINGLE AND SORT OF IRRESISTIBLE??? WEAR A FAKE WEDDING RING!




Today I was determined to get past that one hurdle that keeps stopping me from getting the job. I don't NEED to have a full time job because I work for myself but as I have mentioned ad nauseum I don't like working for myself. I want a mentor. The two hour interview went swimmingly, he introduced me to his staff, he went to great lengths to tell me his practice philosophy, his health problems, (?), his whole life practically. His staff gave me a very good vibe, they were playful and all so different! Love me some diversity!

OH, I start tomorrow! Thank you, thank you very much!



2 comments:

Disney said...

Wait, so did you wear the ring??? You've made excellent points and I have considered wearing a ring in professional settings, more to deter unwanted attention than to comfort a spouse.

JD-Maybe said...

@DISNEY

I wore the ring!