Monday, October 20, 2008

What would u do if you weren't doing what you do?

First--- I do not regret going to law school and I want to be a lawyer, always have and probably will be happy doing it but.......I can't help but wonder what would I do if I weren't doing what I do.

Sometimes I think about what my friends do everyday and it goes a lil somethin' like this: Work a 9-5 go home, feed the kids, hang with the spouse, watch T.V., workout and enjoy living. I don't think they are plagued by any deep troubling thoughts about why things are the way they are. I spend way too much time pondering things that I don't need to. My friends all think I am strange and for the most part they are right.

They work to live. I live to work. That is the difference. I have always been that way and have always gotten over my head with my obsessive studies or work. If I wasn't spending all my time studying I would be working late and overtime instead. Wouldn't it be nice to go to work get your job done and then go home where your real day begins. What is that like? To have different priorities. What is it like to worry all day about what you will make for dinner instead of worrying about getting another 2 hours of studying in?

Sometimes I dream of owning a small home with a small yard and having a semi easy job and taking trips and vacations with my girlfriends or family. Honestly, I am not counting on a fat paycheck after all of this is said and done and I never really have. I was looking for something challenging that fit my strengths and personality type when I chose this field of work. To me it's still a good fit. I wonder if no matter what-- people find a way to make their own problems and stress seem and feel worse than another persons? I think so. Based on the other blogs I read I seem to be the only one who melts down on a regular basis. Could also be that I am a serious drama queen who needs a lot of luv and attention at all times ;) This loner lifestyle doesn't fit anymore.

On a lighter note--the girls from M-Law came through once again and saved me from my peril. We scrapbooked for our boss all day yesterday. We laughed, and laughed, and ate pizza and ice cream it was great. I felt much better today. Except I went to the gym then came home and ate a slice of pizza.....I've gained 5lbs so far! But I ate good all day and had a super hard work so I don't feel bad. I know I'm not too interesting these days but my mind is sort of mush.


Anonymous said...

Nah, you aren't the only one who melts down, trust me. I just tend not to write about it. I stick to be boring, it keeps people away, ha.

mommyof4 said...

I guess I am an exception to the rule because I think about what I am going to make for dinner and what I am going to study after dinner so trust me your not missing much.(except my beautiful children of course). Have a Good Week