Friday, September 4, 2009


Wow. I don't remember this adjustment period, it is intense. I have lived with 3 other guys in my life. Since I am 30 years old I don't think it is that shocking. Anyway, all 3 other situations involved the two of us moving out of our respective apartments into a shared apartment. Never one moving into the other's already existing apartment. This particular situation involves me moving in with him.

It has been a roller coaster to put it mildly. My brain is buzzing with contradictory thoughts--I am utterly confused. There are times when I think I absolutely could not live without him and then there are times when I want to stab him in the eyeball with a dull spoon. Believe me when I say the feeling is mutual. These thoughts usually occur within hours of each other and that is what troubles me. One moment I'm doing something and I think omg I'm so in love-- then four hours later I'm thinking omg can i really live with this? When will my mind rest? It has only been a week and the first three days of it we spent fighting. Good start, right? I will admit I started every fight and had absolutely no reason other than the usual suspect (pms). Poor guy.

He seems fine. I guess no matter how you slice way or another I have to learn how to do this because god forbid this doesn't work out...eventually there will be another and unless I want to die alone-- I better learn to cope, share, be fair, compromise, and bite my fucking tongue!

On a lighter note.....

We had a mini-part-time-evening-grown-up-bar-review last night. It was six guys and ME. Fucking horrific! They spent a good hour of the two we were all together talking about all the skanks at school. All of these boys have girlfriends or wives and yet they still could not resist ranking and tearing up every girl they could remember. It was very uncomfortable, especially because LS Boy was probably dying to put in his two cents but he knew he would get kicked in the nuts if he did. Talk about awkward. Oh, and I did NOT drink because I am a fucking maniac when I drink and I don't want to be that girl ANYMORE! I had dessert and coffee and I don't care if that is dorky.

Walmart vs. Home Depot vs. Target

LSBoy and I take frequent trips to all of the above named stores. He works the swing shift so our only chance at interacting with civilization is going to Walmart at odd hours of the night. This last visit was especially great. Walmart, in an attempt to lure in the upper class shoppers is redesigning their entire store. This means that all the aisles are torn up and the store is a freaking safety hazard. You can't turn a corner without being assaulted by a huge wobbily stack of boxes, or some other item that is bound to kill you if you don't pay close attention. LSBoy and I do some quality people watching there and we leave feeling quite depressed. The shoppers at these odd hours are typically strung out welfare recipients and their offspring. Kids are filthy, poorly dressed, and usually acting out. Dads are strung out on drugs and highly impatient with all that is going on around them. At one point I thought I was going to get robbed. Anyway, LSBoy was walking around with this horrible look on his face and I asked him what was wrong and he said he was "terrified" I laughed so hard I had tears running down my face. He is so sheltered.

Then we go to Home Depot where the clientele is a little more civilized but no less interesting. We analyze their jobs, what they might be doing etc.

Target is the middle ground.

And that my friends is the extent of the socializing me and LSBoy have done in the last few months. Poor me.


Anonymous said...

Your mind will rest when you realize that he is not out to get you and you are to old to continue to set yourself up for failure! Its ok to be happy :)

JD-Maybe said...

Thanks, I think?