Thursday, April 22, 2010

Boobs and Good People at their Worst

I have a love hate relationship with boobs. I love mine and I hate yours. You see if a girl walks in with what I consider nice boobs I instantly hate her. I usually hate really pretty girls too. The thing is that I feel awkward with these boobs working in a law firm. I told the surgeon I can't look like a two bit whore, I dont want to be a freak show I just want till fill out a bra. So at a 34 D sometimes Im not happy with them and other times I want to look at them all day. They are not humongous but...they are noticeable. I really truly feel contempt when I see a nice rack--is that weird or what.

I meant to be really clever and funny but as usual I have some impromptu conflict in my life, here at 10pm on a thursday night with a big day at work ahead of me. Do they have a pill for that? (KMason?)

im going to go count sheep or maybe count days till I can finally be satisfied with my life. I think I might be ok forgoing love and kids and all that bullshit and be one of those cold ass super hot single old bitches that works 100 hours and comes home to an empty apartment and a full bottle of wine...What say you?

BTW when you dont hear from me in a long time its because I have consumed myself in my miserable life and don't care to bring you all down. Right now my job is my savior.

I work with barbie and she is something else. I actually think I might love her ;) She is a super duper pretty prissy princess bitch (no boobs) but she is crude as all hell you gotta love that. "Alice in wonderland with a truck drivers mouth" DP Now that is my kinda lady ;)

Family law is like an 8 hour jerry springer episode it overstimulates me, my head spins. They say "Good people at their worst." Can you all say PRENUP!!!! Wow you people out there are fucked up in the head! I wanna scream, "Listen you hysterical fucking bastard let the bitch keep the crystal lamp, take your 20 year old girlfriend and move the fuck on. After all this phone call cost you more than the lamp, Im sure.

1 comment:

Pollyanna said...

Gotta love my mom.. Those were the days.