Saturday, September 8, 2012

A-Sexual Ex- Boyfriend

In October it will be one year since I left LSBoy! It took approximately 8 months to stop missing him, now I occasionally think of him but only for a moment. Soooooo, can someone please explain to me why I had the following dream last night:

I went to his house, broke in through an unlocked window, and found BigGulp Cups with girls names on them in black marker. One on each side of the bed. His cup was on the counter in the kitchen. Imagine a Starbucks cup with your name on it but this was a BigGulp cup.

Here is where it gets interesting, I look down on the floor in my dream, and it is covered in used condoms. Just lying on the floor. There must have been 50 of them. And I was fucking furious! I was thinking in my dream: "That son of a bitch fucked some bitches 50 times last night? Oh and a threesome on top of everything?! That asshole would make me go weeks without."

There is nothing more damaging to a woman's self confidence than showing her daily that you DO NOT desire her. As far as looks are concerned, I'm a solid 7 and on a good day maybe an 8.5. I don't smell, I always do my makeup, back then I was even super skinny. His excuse: It happens to me all the time in long term relationships.

You can figure that one out. My therapist was absolutely convinced he is gay. She might be right, after all her ex husband cheated on her with a man then left her for another man. I'm guessing in hindsight she sees all the red flags she ignored and probably thought I was doing the same. They are BFF now but that's not the point.

If I was Freud I'd say the condoms on the floor and the cups represent the a-sexuality and the condoms also represent the hoarder tendencies. The is real hoarder shit like the kind you see on TV. I actually have pictures. I save the pictures in case he pisses me off- I'll send them to his mom, along with his blow job video with his ex that I took from him. <---I realize that also sounds contradictory to his A-Sexuality but I feel like he hates women and demeaning them sexually does actually excite him. I watched the video and he was scolding the girl "This is the least you could do." She looked absolutely miserable and was NOT enjoying the act. It was fucking awful on so many levels but my curiosity got the best of me.

No more LSBoy dreams universe. Thank you!


D said...

Do you realize that men hit their sexual peak when us girls are barely through puberty. Then, right about now, us ladies hit our sexual peak and all the sudden the guys are over it and disinterested. What a horrible game. A great guy makes you feel sexy and desirable ALL the time. Now that LSBoy is gone, you're freed up for greatness! No more night-terrors! Oh, and I really wanna see the video. Like, really really.

bail bonds said...

Condoms hahahaha-I like Your Blog have been coming here for more stores..No more dreams a---we will see...:)